Family Can Surprise you...

I dont know about you, but i dont come from one of those families that is really close. I come from the type of family that only sees each other on holidays. (Christmas, Thanksgiving, etc) At least that is the way it was before my grams died. Since then, its like none of us want anything to do with the other, we are so vastly different that having us all in one place is more dangerous to our health then not. (Mind you I am talking about my moms side of the family, my dads side of the family I dont really talk too, since I dont really even talk to my dad.) But anyways, lets try and stay on topic. The only people that i am really close to are my immediate family: My mom and My little big brother as I call him. Since he is 6 inches taller and 6 years younger then me. Its been like that since I was little, we have learned to rely on one another and I honestly dont know what I would do without them, even though sometimes I want to bop my bro on the head, but hey that is to be expected. We are so different it is astounding, yet that is what makes our relationship so strong. My mother is one of the most amazing people I have ever met in my entire life. She is not only my mother but my best friend, and without her i would be lost. Back to what i was saying...

On Sunday the 17th, I got an amazing awsome couldnt stop smiling phone call. One of those phone calls that makes you want to jump up and down because you are so happy. I got a phone call from my cousin Chris.(cousin from my dads side) A little background: Chris and I are like 7 months apart in age and have been best friends since birth, no matter how far we lived from each other or how much life got in the way we made sure we stayed in contact. Well some odd weeks ago Chris left for Army Basic Training. Now you may be asking; how is he calling me from basic? Well  I dont know I guess they got phone rights or something. Something about you give the soldiers their phones and moral improves. I didnt question, I was just so happy to hear from him. I got to talk to him for 45 mins before he got off and called his daughter. It was one of those moments that it was like "ahhh okay he is okay" ::wipes brow:: My cousin has always wanted to be in the military, we come from a military family. Our plan had been to join together, so he got all his paperwork squared away, as did I. Well I come to find out that I can no longer join him since I am in fact pregnant. Oh well, everything happens for a reason, so I promise him I will be at his graduation. (even though I will be 7 months pregnant) I come to find out that flying from Idaho to Georgia, renting a car, a hotel room..etc. Is like $800 all together, when I would only be able to see him for the 12 hours on family day. So as I try to explain to him that I have to break a promise (first one broken ever, and most important so far) I become miss emotional (damn hormones) lucky me, I have the best cousin EVER because he then goes on and starts making me laugh with his sarcastic rather raunchy humor, that is in fact my cousin. So all is good. He is having a blast in boot, which is cool to hear, I guess with all the new rules and regulations boot camp isnt what he thought it was going to be, in fact he is rather disappointed that it is as easy as it is. He makes me laugh. I am so proud of my cousin, for finally doing something that is making him happy, after all of these years. I miss him terribly but I know that I will see him after he goes to AIT. Im still upset I cannot make it to his graduation, but I guess that is life. So that is one family surprise...

Then yesterday I get an unexpected package from my Aunt Pat. (which I thought it was a little weird since it was HER birthday). I open up the package and low and behold it is filled with babygirl stuff. My heart sank, I was in shock. So I slowly take every piece of clothing out and show them to my mom, as tears start running down my face. It was one of the nicest thing my Aunt has ever done for me, even though it wasnt for me it was for babygirl, but you know what I mean. It warmed my heart to know that I do have the support of my family, at least a little. Its hard to explain because when I first got pregnant the first reaction was; well youre not married, whos the father, how are you going to raise this baby, etc. And with one little box with some very cute baby clothes, I might add it feels that there is some sort of support there. Even though they still ask all of the other questions. All in all it was a very nice surprise, one I will never forget. So I call my aunt and thank her (as well as wish her a happy birthday), and come to find out that she has more babygirl stuff to send me. That was only one box of many. I am in shock at this point. She is so excited that I am having a babygirl. I guess she had wanted a babygirl when she was pregnant, but ended up with my cousin Jack. As well as this being the first grandbaby on my mothers side. So at least someone is happy.

All in all the past few days have been filled with surprises. I dont know how to explain it in any other way but that. How do you put happiness and appreciation into words so that other people can understand them, without having them have lived your life to know the background. Just know that those two acts of kindness (the phone call from my cousin, and the presents from my aunt) will forever be remembered. I am thankful for my family, even though we may not show it all the time, I at least know that the love is there. Here are some pictures of the fam bam.

                                                  My mother, Me and My "little big" brother.

                                    Chris and I. Like I said: we have been best friends since birth.

Me and chris. He is the one in the box. One of my all time favorite pictures.

Chris's Bootcamp picture

The beautiful babygirl clothes my aunt sent me

New To This Whole Thing

I dont even know where to start, or even if I should. I am new to this whole "Blog" thing. I dont know if I am willing to have my life out there on the internet. So the question is 'why am I writing in this little box'? haha I dont even know. Im a journal person, old school you might say. I enjoy writing in my journal, cutting up newspapers and magazines to make collages, renting movies or going out and buying them, buying cds (not burning them), reading books (to add to my library). You know all the things it seems the world has forgotten we used to do. I am not saying there is anything wrong with the 'new way' of life, just saying I prefer the old ways. But see that is such a contradiction since I am in fact on the internet writing on an online blog. To be honest I am not even really a fan of the internet. Even though like it seems the rest of the world, I have fallen prey to the world of Facebook. I thought Myspace was bad, haha not even close. Now you may ask 'why are you even on here then?' Well, to be honest...I am having a brain fart when it comes to writing in my journal. It seems I have so many thoughts, yet my hand is unwilling to transfer them onto paper. Plus to sum it up, im lonely...

A little background into the world of Kalee: I have spent my entire life (23 years) minus the past 8 months in Southen California. In Oct 2010 my mother decided that she wanted to have a midlife crisis. (well that is at least what I think happened). So we packed up our entire house and put it into storage, she quit her job of 23 years and we got into the car and drove. My first thoughts were "whoo hoo roadtrip". I mean who doesnt enjoy a good roadtrip? Anyways... We hit Vegas for Halloween (an experience I dont remember much of) then Utah and ended up in Boise, Idaho. My mom has always wanted to visit Boise, so we thought a nice little stop on the way to Portland, Oregon would be good. Little did I know we would never leave. Oy Vey. After a month of staying in a hotel and sight seeing, we decided as a family, what the heck...LETS MOVE TO IDAHO. I dont know if any of you have ever been to Idaho in the winter, but if you have then you know. Moving to Idaho in November is not a very good idea, but how the heck were we supposed to know. I mean we're Californians what did we know about snow, freezing temperatures, and black ice. Absolutley nothing.

 I think one of the coolest things to come out of that whole moving in the winter thing was, my 18 year old brother finally saw snow for the first time. We had our first snow ball fight, our first snow day (where there was a foot of snow on the ground), we made our first igloo out of snow until our hands were frozen even though we had on two pairs of gloves, we made our first snowman, and for the first time it felt like we were acting like a family.

So much yet so little has happened these past 8 months in Idaho, I would love to write about everything but I am afraid the world doesnt need to know, nor am I willing to let the world know. I will say this though, Idaho is an interesting place to live when you have spent your entire life in Southern California. To say 'culture shock' is a bit of an understatement.

Since living in Idaho I have tried to make friends, and have in return been blown off, insulted and judged more then I have ever been in my entire life. (And that is saying alot since growing up in So Cal is not easy).I thought by moving to Idaho I would meet some good down to earth people, and in return...I havent. Now I am not saying that EVERYONE from Idaho is judgemental, I am just saying that just the ones that i have met have been. Maybe it is my fault. I let my guard down, a wall that had been protecting me the entire time I lived in Cali. I dont know if this is making any sense, or even if I want it too. I mean how do you write about your life? Its not supposed to be easy, is it?

One good thing that I can say that came out of being in Idaho is...I am going to be a mommy. Wow, me a mom. Still kinda trip out on it sometimes. In a nut shell: met a guy in Nov right after i moved here, kinda started dating. If that is what you want to call it. HA! We hung out Nov-the beginning of Feb. Then he got a new girlfriend. Well at the end of Feb i found out I was pregnant, did the adult thing and told him, and he did the asshole thing and told me he didnt want "it" or anything to do with me. We havent talked since. Guys sure can be deuche bags.

Anywho, I am now 24 years old, living in Idaho (away from everyone I have ever known and everything I have ever known), pregnant with a wonderful babygirl and talking to myself in a blog. Haha. Oh how the world works, when I had told myself I would never have a blog. Oh the irony. Now this blog isnt for anyone but me, but hey if people want to read it I guess that is fine. I mean it is on the internet after all. But to be honest my life isnt that entertaining or interesting. I am just a normal person trying to find my place in the world, trying to figure out who I am, and now trying to figure out what kind of mother I want to be. So come on in and...Welcome to Kalee's World.